Some people just have this programmed notion in their head that things come easy, not realizing that to get to a certain place, it takes work and dedication. Not everyone was born with a silver spoon in their mouth. To be honest, I don’t know too many people that were. Plastic spoon maybe but silver? Nah.

So it bugs me out when people make this assumption especially when it’s family.

My 22 year old cousin is lazy. Capital L-A-Z-Y. I’m calling her out on here and I called her out in person when I saw her this past weekend. Ever since she was born, she’s been babied. Barely made it through high school. Dropped out of college after one week because it wasn’t for her. I got her a job through a friend of mine and she quit after two weeks saying they were being too hard on her. When I asked mutual friend what happened, he told me she came in late everyday and would take 2 hour lunches and was slacking. Go figure. Ran up her cell phone bill and credit cards to astronomical amounts and each time, someone bailed her out. So for the last couple of years, she hasn’t been working, sitting on her ass and pimping my grandmother and aunt for money. She has a child now and still continues to sit on her ass. So I took it to her, in true smart ass in your face but not demeaning F.resh fashion and then when I was done, I took to her pops, my aunt and my grandmother.

She thinks everything was handed to me. It was quite the opposite. Sure ma dukes provided for me but I saw what she did and how she bust her ass to give to me. I internalized that same work ethic from her and got on my grind too. It’s gotten me to where I’m at now and it’s damn sure going to take me past here to reach my goals. From the jump, my mom taught me how to be self-sufficient. And while I griped and groaned and said stuff under my breath, today, I’m grateful.

When I got to college, I knew how to cook (not gourmet but well enough to survive), separate and wash clothes and other “basic” stuff. You’d be surprised how many people couldn’t survive away from home. Not to mention, how many people walked around with “light blue” t-shirts that were originally “white”.

After a while, you have to let go. Little Shanequa isn’t little anymore. She’s a damn teenager about to graduate from high school so why are you still doing things for her? Little Leroy needs to know how to iron his own clothes before he gets to college. (That’s another true college tale for you). This (among other reasons) is why you have these 30+ year old dudes who never left home. You gotta give them tough love.

NOBODY WILL HELP YOU UNLESS YOU HELP YOURSELF.