Always Funky Fresh – The Blog v2.0

In reading my lovely local paper, The Washington Post online this past weekend, I came across this article:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/03/12/AR2010031202154.html?hpid=sec-metro

In a nutshell, the lady is a stripper exotic dancer and has decided that she’s going to sue the resident pole keeper for wages. Yup. Wages. She feels exotic dancers should be paid hourly wages like someone working in Mickie D’s for example.

Now I’m no exotic dancer connoisseur but I have frequented been to a few establishments including the one referenced in this article. In most cases, you don’t pay a cover BUT you pay for drinks and of course, you “make it rain” so the dancers can reap the benefits and pay for their tuition.

Now they want wages. Next comes benefits. Should they get offered a PPO or HMO? And what if they get pregnant while working duty in the champagne room? Will FMLA support their leave? What if they don’t lose the weight after pregnancy and their performance degrades and they get fired? Now they gotta get unemployment? What if they slip on the pole cause Peaches had too much baby oil on her? That’s short or long term disability!  How about tuition re-imbursement? Expenses reports for the new pair of clear heels?

There’s a lot to consider here.

My favorite part of the article when the one club owner said “I don’t want to say nothing about nothing”

**Somewhere out there I know someone is saying “hoe sit down” ***

Ask me whatever you want (anonymously)

http://www.formspring.me/alwaysfunky

My boys wife doesn’t like me.

I’m not talking about that playing type of “I don’t like you” that some of you give me when I post something stupid. This is real. She don’t like me.

How do I know?

My boy told me. Over dinner this week. See I’m on travel for work, in his neck of the woods, in a different time zone and if my peoples are in the area I’m traveling to, I like to check them out. So I called and we agreed to meet up for dinner, only thing, she didn’t show up. Eh, no biggie. I was cordial. I asked how she was. Then he told me. In a nice way.  ”You’re not exactly one of her favorite people”.

Oh word?

Read more…

For all of you who were afraid to come to the site before because you were getting some random malware error, you’re good now. I found the culprit and it’s been removed. Although if you were getting a malware error, you’re probably not reading this now.

Anyway Friday Randoms…….

If you put a “#” in front of your words, you probably use Twitter a bit too much. #fugginstupid.

I know I said I’d tweet more often but I can’t. Everytime I log on, there’s a certain person I’m following that is ALWAYS tweeting.  For kicks and giggles, I counted it one day. Over an hour period, there were over 50 tweets. 50!?!?!?!?!

So I work in the IT field and do some consulting outside of my gig. One company had me come in a few weeks ago. Complained that stuff was running slow. I do a quick analysis. What I find? Facebook, Twitter, YouTube – top 3 applications used. Needless to say the owner was PISSED and is planning to shut down access. When I leave, I see the receptionist on Twitter. Me: “You might want to get that on your phone”…. Her:  What?!?!?!**clueless look**

Read more…

As I was sitting here snowed in like most of the Mid-Atlantic, I, of course had nothing to do but think……

Well I actually have a few things to do. Don’t sleep. I’m not THAT bored but nevertheless, here are some random snow thoughts….

** There used to be bread on these shelves. But now? Not so much…….I mean all a brother was trying to do was get some buns for my Boca burgers!!!!

**The funniest thing about the grocery store? All of the unhealthy stuff was gone. All of the healthy stuff? Plenty. Shows where people priorities are.

**I watched a woman damn near take a store assistant’s head off because he told her he didn’t have any more white eggs. Mind you, there was a whole rack of organic and brown eggs right next to her.

**I’m glad the Super Bowl is over. Congrats Saints but I got tired of random people saying WHO DAT when they had no business.

**There’s a line thin between CABIN FEVER and STUPIDITY.

Cabin fever is “I’ve been trapped in my house for 3-4 days and I need to get out to get some fresh air”.

Stupidity is “I’ve been in my house for 2 hours and I want a bag of Utz Red Hot chips so let me drive my Mini-Cooper to the 7-Eleven even though there’s 22 inches of snow on the ground and the 23rd is falling”

See the difference?

** Speaking of cars, I know your CLK’s and 3-series BMW’s are hot whips….in the summer….but in the winter, during a blizzard, get “them cute shits” off the damn road and out of my way. I can’t tell you how many people I’ve seen over the last week in these cars struggling to turn corners, get up the street, get out of parking lots, etc. Even had one spin out in front of me and suddenly face on coming traffic…..

**Oh and the above person, was trying to drive and talk on her cell phone. I know your car has bluetooth. Use that shit, concentrate on the road. As a matter of fact, get that cute shit off the damn road…..Geesh…

**Ladies, as much as I’m a fan of high heels and boots, this is NOT the weather for it. Go get you some Uggs or some other snow boots. Get some fake Uggs from Payless. Like Fuggs or something. I don’t care. Anything to save you from busting your ass. And if you’re going on a booty call, carry your heels in a plastic bag or that big ass purse you own…..PSA Over.

**This snow stuff put a dent in my workout schedule. Mind you the shoveling is a workout in itself and I do some pushups and dabbled in the on-demand stuff (I said that so BK doesn’t yell at me) but I need the gym. I need people. I need that shorty with the BANGIN’ body to be on the treadmill in front of me….Inspiration I tell ya…..

I used to live up north, way above the Mason Dixon line. New England to be exact. Massachusetts to be even more specific.

Besides the fact that I was a NY’er living in Beantown (Boston) and would constantly get an obscenity thrown my way for wearing my Yankee hat around, it was an okay place to live. I mean, it was different and I chose to move there for that reason. Something new (and there was a lot of that too. Let’s see who gets that reference).

For the most part, I tolerated that area until………the winter.

The winters were…….a bitch. There’s no other way to put it. I mean I’ve lived upstate NY. I’ve been to Chicago in the winter. I’ve been to Wisconsin and Minneapolis when it was -20/30 degrees WITHOUT the wind chill but I knew I was leaving. I was only there for a day or two. I LIVED in New England. There’s a difference.

My co-workers used to say eventually you’ll become immune to it. Never happened. After one winter where I swear we got hit with like 5 of these Nor’easters, I decided to bounce. I couldn’t take the snow. Not in those amounts. A dusting to them was like 8 inches. A dusting to me, 1-2 inches. I used to go into these moods. These “please let me be” moods. I wouldn’t say depression but it knocked the life out of me. Family used to call and check up on me. Even my residential snow bunnies couldn’t help. (hey I had to do something to stay warm) and they tried their best

I’m a summer baby. I thrive on sunshine. On warmth. Not this cold snow ish.

I say all of this to say this snow that the DC area has been plastered with this winter is making me feel like I’m back in New England. And another storm is on the way. Got me thinkin’ about moving further south.

For all of you who deal with this on a regular basis…..I don’t know how you do it.

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will blog more

I will tweet too.

I just read an article in the Washington Post about how a local county leader basically wants to pass legislation that curbs the number of fast food restaurants that open.

The article (which I’ll include a link to at the bottom of the post) stated that in a two block stretch there were 11 fast food restaurants. Couple that with the fact that the obesity numbers for adolescents have ranged between 30-40% since 2002 and this activist has basically had enough.

Can’t say I blame him though. I live near the area he’s referring to. I think there’s about 6 fast food spots on one block and they range from greasy to greasiest.

But you know passing legislation like this is going to be tough. There’s going to be all sorts of opposition from business, lobbyists, even people who don’t mind eating a Big Mac value meal 3 times a day. You can’t let the government control you like that can you? Even if it’s intended to save your life?

I was in New York City over the holidays and walked into McDonalds and saw a big sign with the calories next to it and walked right back out. That’s government imposed isn’t it?

I’d love to see healthier restaurants exist and I know they do, the problem is they are in more affluent areas because it typically costs more. Ask someone if they’d rather pay $10 for a salad or an extra value meal and get back change?!?!?!

So what do you think?

Should the government get more involved or should people just take more responsibility for what they eat?

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/01/25/AR2010012503078.html?hpid%3Dmoreheadlines&sub=AR

Who didn’t do it?

Maybe not the first time it came on, but I guarantee you that at some point in your life, you saw a music video come on and it inspired you.

Inspired you to do what?

Dance.

Just like how they do it in the video.

You would stare at the screen until you got it. And lawd, you’d have the VCR ready to record when your favorite video show – The Box, Video Music Box, Yo! MTV Raps, Rap City maybe even Hot Tracks (if you’re old enough to remember that). Then once you got it on tape, it was on.  (Listen if they have TiVo and DVR back then, I would have been nicer than nice with the dance moves..ya heard!)

I heard this song on the radio today and it instantly took me back. I distinctly remember trying to imitate everything. Every move. The song was just that fresh. You had no choice but to move.

But to complete the cipher, you didn’t just dance like that. You had to “be” like them. You had to dress like them because then when you did it around your friends at someone’s birthday house party, you would be compared to “them”. My mom wouldn’t let me rock the steel/silver/metal plate shoes (check the video to see what I’m talking about) but I somehow “acquired” the VW.

Ahhh the VW. Stands for Volkswagen. It’s the symbol and what cats would do is steal them joints from the cars and put them on either their belt buckles or as buckles on their shoes. Complete that with a crazy lookin’ jungle shirt or some polka dot shirt, some black pants and can’t forget my flat-top with a few parts in it fresh from the barber.

All so I could rock out to this……….

A year ago today I was standing at the mall in DC watching history unfold in front of me. The 44th President of the United States was sworn in and as I stood there literally freezing, I couldn’t help but think of the fact that I lived to see this and helped make history.

Being out there that day was a scene I will never ever forget in my life. Being around that many people of all colors, ages, genders who all just got along for those few hours.

What bugs me out though is that it’s only been a year and I hear people upset about the lack of change. Change doesn’t take place overnight. Change is gradual and to be honest I am not upset about what’s he’s accomplished so far. If you think about it, he has to undo 8 years of craziness. He can’t do that in one year. He’s not superman. Give the man time. Now he’s settled. Now he’s used to things. Give him time and give him support. Change will come.

(by the way, Massachusetts I’m very disappointed)